Guest story by anonymous contributor and a real life story.

I grew up in an environment of art, music, theater, politics, spiritual discussions and exchange of ideas and graduated from one of the top five colleges in India.

I was never made to feel any different from boys.

I have always been respected for my knowledge and intellect, especially by my parents who I really look up to.

I worked with some of the best brands of the country. I was doing pretty well at my work, traveled, met all kinds of people and learned many new things in my career.

Propelled with this confidence I went to my new home. Even though this was a love marriage I was half freaked out.

I was totally out of my comfort zone; it was a new place, new tastes and different vibe… I was a bahu living with in-laws.

I was now not that girl, to who her dad brought food himself to her bed, or made tea for her lovingly at her request. This was not going to happen here. However, I was ready to begin and adjust.

Jolts started coming soon after. I didn’t understand what hit me. Everything I did started being wrong. Apparently everything I had learnt from my mother was wrong.

Every day was a performance evaluation; every day a review meeting with my husband where my mother-in-law listed her complaints.

Every day a new addition to the tone of language she would address me with.

Every day she creatively came up with newer ways to verbally attack me; in his presence, in his absence, in front of guests and even the maids.

I was under depression by now even though I wouldn’t show it. I didn’t reply. I tried to reach the ends of their expectations. I cooked, cleaned and helped my husband in his business as much as I could cope before getting exhausted.

I never demanded clothes, shoes, jewelry, expensive holidays or gifts. I only accepted when he gave them to me out of his will. I am very self- respecting in that manner; I don’t like to ask.

I thought of my parents…

Slowly and sadly I began to realize that this is not my home. They didn’t consider me a member of the house.

My husband put a strict restriction on me on talking back to my mother-in-law on her taunts.

He wanted to be the politically correct one and did not want to get in the middle of this and just focus on his work, while I continued to suffer her mental abuse on a daily basis multiple times a day.

I thought of my parents…

I was in a constant struggle to justify my existence in that house. My husband stood up for me when he could, but he never really could stick to a side.

I would think he is protecting me and then all of a sudden he would completely change places. I didn’t know which reality to believe. They hated my guts. They wanted a maid.

As long as I was walking on their dotted line it was good, but the minute I would try to be the decision maker, it was a huge problem.

I couldn’t do anything without their or my husband’s permission.

I thought of my parents…

I began to recover from this shock and came to a point where I was just observing things now. I began to understand what they really wanted from me.

This kept on happening until one day, fueled by his mother he decided to cross his boundaries with me, leaving me no choice but to fight back full throttle.

They wanted someone submissive who wouldn’t stand up for herself. That was the day I drew my lines. I think we all recognize the line between adjustment and self-respect.

Why did I think of my parents?

It seemed that every time I was wronged mentally and verbally, their faces came in front of my eyes and they asked me only one question – did we really send you to the best schools, educated you and loved you, so you could behave like an intellectually challenged dimwit and allow yourself to be treated this way?

I was lucky that I had my family’s support to walk out of this marriage.

There are countless women who are still experiencing what I experienced, probably worse and don’t have a home to come back to.

I know how valuable your tears are.

I know how you remember the days you were a free bird in your home.

I know how suffocated you are feeling as you read this article at this very moment.

I know how you feel when you are the only one there to defend yourself.

Don’t be afraid. They are only human beings, just like you. There is nothing super natural about them that you need to tolerate their abuses.

If your parents don’t you, get financially independent and get the hell out of there when you can.

Take help of the authorities if you need to.

Somehow Indian men don’t understand that just like the girl, they too need to leave the nest and grow up from being their mama’s boys, make their own families.

The only most powerful thing about time is that it changes. Just take a step; it will change for you too, like it did for me.