Why we fear giving or taking commitment?
Fear of commitment
RKDel
#2
Nice question...
Well i guess not all fears in giving or taking commitment... It depends on person to person...
In India in most of the cases yes it is there... But I think that's because of the society, environment and family expectations in which they are grew.
As an Indian guy/girl we always follows are elders and their commands... It's in our nature...
This Indian society is still don't support freedom of doing anything...
I guess that's why we fear that our elders would not like our choice of actions...
But India is changing.. This new generation is different one... Now people are lot open minded...
But still a long road to go...
RKDel
#4
So I guess not only in commitment... in all things which we think our elders will not like.. We fear...
And if there is something which our elder supports then we never hesitate...
Tubelight
#6
Y we blame elders for everything ? Honestly tell me whenever u goof up or play around... U take consent of your partner... Do u ever thought of taking it from the elders... I hope u now know y the answer is nice but vague & diplomatic...
RKDel
#7
Ok... well there is difference in playing around and taking life decisions...
You can't avoid your elders from your life decisions...
RKDel
#8
If you don't have anyone to worry about then no need to fear in anything.. it's your life.. do whatever you wanna do.. And in this case doing anything with your life is good as long as it does not affect any other person.
RKDel
#9
Correction in above comment:
And in this case doing anything with your life is OK... as long as it does not affect any other person.
Administrator
#10
Hi @RKDel and @Tubelight
Here is old Uncle's take on the question. It is a very good question.
We fear giving or taking commitments because somewhere somehow we've grown too shallow.
Whom to blame for that?
Mainly new media
New media brought us the graphic revolution. All what we see nowadays, is bright, shining, tall, cherubic. perfect proportion. And we've taken all this as the new normal.
New media also teaches us that we deserve nothing less than what it advertises, that we should go for all of it, grab all of it, take the fullest out of it.
Therefore if we don't get the perfection we feel like we are going below our standards.
We are constantly in a situation when we think that this is not enough, we should get lot more from things, from people.
That's why we don't want to give commitments.
Because we are convinced that the next best thing will be around the corner, waiting for us. We fail to live here and now and instead we are always in anticipation.
SnapDragon44
#12
Lets see how i can answer your question as well -
Couple of reasons here - 2 kinds of commitment - dating relationship - exclusivity and MARRIAGE -
Dating and relationships - Fear of commitment here comes because - ppl dont want to be tied down to 1 person. People are not able to be loyal these days. Everyone is fucking around everyone. married - dating- almost everyone is doing it. The idea of loyalty is changing.
Sexual compatibility changes everything - you dont want to commit to someone you dont sexually get with.
Both men and women live in a delusion that they can own the other person. The sooner both realise that this is absolute fuckery and you cant suffocate them with ownership - commitment becomes easier.
MARRIAGE
Huge issue. legally tied down - responsibilities - children - financial responsibility - loss of freedom - loss of friendship and respect between both - being forced to grow up - pressure to progress - ego clashes -
It's very tricky business.
THE BIGGEST REASON IS - PEOPLE THEMSELVES DONT KNOW WHAT THEY WANT.
They don't know who they are.